This time last year...

Picture of me, October 2008. I was 5 months pregnant and really starting to show. When Nathan showed me this picture, I cried. I thought I looked liked a whale, and that pregnancy had completely ruined my body. If only I had known what was coming...

This time last year I was pregnant. Very, very pregnant. My due date had been determined to be March 10th. I put a lot of stock in that date, this being my first pregnancy and all. I spent 30 weeks (we didn't find out I was pregnant until I was almost 12 weeks along) counting down the days until March 10th. I couldn't sleep the night before. I was completely full of joy and anticipation. Tomorrow, our long awaited baby would arrive. I was ready to finally have him here. And more importantly, I was done with being pregnant.

This time last year I was past my due date, and that made me cranky. March 10th had come and gone without even the slightest of a contraction. After weeks of waiting, we would have to wait some more. And yes, I would have to remain in my pregnant state for at least a few more days.

This time last year I was extremely uncomfortable. The child who was waring out his welcome in my apparently very comfortable uterus was a big baby, and this did not agree with my not so big frame. The child I was carrying was so big, in fact, that my friends and family (and even some very nosey strangers) were sure I was going to have twins.

Either twins, or a basketball...

Photo of me March 11th, 2009. One day after my due date, and very heavy with child. Can you see why I was less than excited to stay pregnant and longer than I absolutely had to?

Auden and the Big Boy Pajamas

A few months ago some good friends gifted our son with an adorable pair of baby gap flannel pajamas. I loved them, but they were much to big for our baby boy. Two piece and button up and no feeties, not the one piece, zip front, footed sleepers we usually slept him in. In short, big boy pajamas. I folded the cozy little set and placed them in a basket full of other to-big-for-him-now clothes and put the basket on the highest shelf of his closet.

A few nights ago, after my babys bath, I went searching through his room, looking for a pair of pajamas that would fit him. No luck. Auden had somehow outgrown every one of his little sleepers in just a days time. I remembered the flannel pajamas he had been given months ago, and decided to pull them out and try them on. I didn't actually expect them to fit. They were, after all, big boy pajamas, and my son was just a baby. But they did fit. And all of the sudden my tiny little baby didn't look like a tiny little baby at all.

We continued on with our night time routine. A book, then a second book. Dim the lights. A song, and then another. And then two or three more. Lights out. Kiss his head, hug him tight. Tell him I love him and put him down in his bed, where he will drift off into a dream.

A couple hours later as I walked down the hall, headed for my own bed, I couldn't resist poking my head into the babys room to check on him. I expected to see him curled up tight, laying on his tummy with his bum up in the air, neatly tucked under his blankets, just like always. What I found instead suprised me. Lying on his back, sprawled out across the entire length of his crib, with his arms thrown up above his head at an awkward angle, and snoring! And there, on top of it all, were those big boy pajamas. What had happened? My baby used to look like a perfect little angel when he slept. Now he looked like, well, his dad. I could not believe this big boy in my sons crib was actually my baby.

I moved quietly out of his room and carefully shut his door behind me. And then it happened. I felt tears stinging my eyes. I had a good cry, right there in the hallway outside of Audens room. Nathan heard the noise and came to me. "He is so big! He's not a baby anymore! It's happening too fast!" I'm pretty sure Nathan thought I was being crazy, but he was sweet to me anyways.

It is true. My once tiny little baby is growing up, and it is happening fast. On Sunday, Auden will be 1 year old. It seems impossible to me that we are here already. Of course I am happy and excited, but there are times that I wish I could just slow down and enjoy every one of these moments with my baby, because I know he won't be a baby for long. I went to the store yesterday and bought some more pajamas for Auden. Some more big boy pajamas. How I love celebrating these little milestones, and how excited I am for a lifetime full of them!

Cleaning and a Cold

Tonight Nathan and I teamed up to clean out our spare bedroom (read: spare bedroom turned storage space turned black hole). We've lived in our house almost four years and during this time the junk in that room seems to have gotten way out of hand. What started out as a small pile of homeless things in the corner had grown to take over the entire room. It was gross and I'd had enough. Cleaning out this room has been on my list of things to do for a long time, but since 'organize spare room' doesn't sound very fun I've been putting it off. Until today. We got down to business and I am happy to report the spare room is clean. Finally crossing that off my list feels really, really good.
So tonight I am happy. And you know who else should be happy? My little brother, Robert. That is because my mother and father will be leaving tomorrow evening for a 3 week vacation in Europe, and while they are gone Robert will be staying here with us. Lucky guy. And since it is now clean, he can stay in the above mentioned guest room rather than on my living room floor. You're welcome Robert.
After all the cleaning fun was through I took my sleepy baby back to his room where I changed his diaper, lotioned his soft skin, dressed him in pajamas, and tucked him in for bed. I walked down the hall and to the living room to find that while I was busy in the spare room, Auden had been busy smashing saltine crackers into my newly vacuumed floor.

Awesome. But this mess will have to wait till morning, because I am pooped. Also, I think I feel a cold coming on? This is no good. Time for me to take some echinachea and go to bed.